Then one day, you realise… it’s been so long since I’ve thought about you, checked up on what you are doing… my life is so filled with happiness and people who love me as I love them… and now, when I do think of you, I am reminded of the toxicity of what we had… and I am so sad that we took that path… that we destroyed the good with our insistence.
Sometimes I just need to rant. I don’t need a solution. I don’t need you telling me how it is or what I should do or how I should act. I just need to vent. I need to scream at the universe and insist it’s all unfair. I need to let it out so I can make room for air again. For thought.
Whenever I’m doubting my efforts, I’ve discovered that if I hop on to my 8 year olds’ school FB year group page, I’ll soon feel on top of it all again :p
Today’s post: did anybody else from3G forget to pack their child’s library bag today? I’m going to be in so much trouble when they get home 😦
And people actually respond positively… they sympathise: me too! I forgot the homework folder last week! Etc…
I want to write (but I won’t): at what age will you let the apron strings go just a little?? At what age will they pack their own bag? Make their own lunch? Tie their own shoes…
My kids packed for Hawaii. I checked if they remembered swimmers. I remembered the passports. I assume they also packed for the two weeks at their dad’s, because I didn’t! And I didn’t hear the expected complaints…
And… my 8 year old has a processing disorder. My aim in life is to get him to remember to put shoes on when he leaves the house. When he’s older, I’ll focus on remembering the wallet, phone, keys… baby steps!
I know his sister helps him. She organises me often enough! She has weekly calendars above both their beds. She makes sure he changes it each week.
But honestly… if they’re expecting me to remember library day? Sports day? Pe? And to be angry when I don’t?!?
Sometimes, I need a memory of a date… but I don’t want to talk about it.
Is arrogance allowed? I’m sure it is… A friend told me not so long ago to never apologise for my arrogance and to never give it up. She made sense.
But at what point is ‘travelling’ just not travelling? Or perhaps it’s that there’s no perceived adventure? Or learning?
My daughter went on an 11 day cruise of the south pacific just before Christmas. She loved ticking off more destinations. She had an incredible trip with friends. But… even she, at the age of 17, acknowledges that she didn’t really ‘see’ or experience the islands they landed on.
I know people who venture to Bali every year. Every single year. Same resort. They love it. They love that they ‘enjoy travelling’.
I know others who take a weekend away and barely leave the hotel. Or take a week at a resort and ‘why on earth would you leave if you’ve paid for it’? Or the weekend cruise. The visit to friends or family where you might ‘eat out’ or ‘see a show’… once.
When does it cease to be travel and start to be acknowledged as a holiday? As a fun time, but seriously… it ain’t travel.
A friend is off to Vanuatu for a romantic getaway. A week at a resort. Because they love to travel… can’t wait to tell everyone of their adventures… because they love to explore… They want to go on a cruise next.
But it’s not ‘travelling’ if you don’t leave the resort. It’s not ‘travelling’ if you drive (or float) from one destination to the next, stop for food or perhaps to parasail, and then keep moving.
Perhaps it is ‘travelling’… but you are not a ‘traveller’. Maybe…
When i say I want to travel the world, I mean I want to experience it. I want the adventures. The mayhem. The uncertainty.
I don’t want to say – OMG, there was this moment when I was completely lost, because I can manage to get lost in a rectangle… and have you cut me off to tell me about the waiter bringing this really amazing cocktail as you lazed around the pool. No. You comparing service from one resort to another, from one country to another, is NOT the same as eating some unknown delights from a street vendor in another culture. Your massage and jetskiing is not the same as hiking through snow or climbing through a volcano. And the thing is… I’m not even convinced my latest trip classifies as ‘travelling’… not to the degree I want it to… but it’s so, so, so much more so than the people who want to tell me about their own adventures.
Ah… arrogance. Their adventures are their own. They are exciting. Their holiday was exactly what they needed and they had an incredible time. Just… please use the vocab accordingly :p